Twitter & Instagram: @rebekastowe
My name is Rebeka Stowe. I am a sunflower state native,
daughter, dreamer, music lover, and runner among other things; who is currently
on an adventure filled journey to become the best I can be, in every area of
life.
I grew up in Olathe, KS and attended Olathe Northwest High
School, where I competed in multiple sports as well as participated in both
Jazz and Concert band. After graduating in 2008 I was provided the opportunity
to continue my running career in Lawrence, KS at the University of Kansas. My
time at Kansas, as a student athlete was full of new friendships, experiences,
challenges and a lot of fun. I completed my athletic career as a Jayhawk at the
2012 Olympic Trials. This experience paired with a lifelong dream of becoming a
professional athlete and Olympian spurred me on and landed me in New Jersey.
Which is where I currently reside and train with the New Jersey New York Track
Club (www.njnytc.com).
To begin this post, Merry Christmas! I haven’t written since
Thanksgiving and I apologize for not providing an update on things sooner. In
my last post I was gearing up for the Manchester Road race on Thanksgiving Day
race went nowhere near as well as I had hoped and I didn’t come close to my
goal of improving on the previous years. This was incredibly disappointing for
me, as my teammates and training partners finished 2nd (Lauren Penney)
and 3rd (Nicole Tully-Schappart) in this race and I was no where to
be found. (finishing in 16th to be exact) They averaged 5:13/mile
for the 5 mile course and I barely managed to squeak out 5:30’s. I finished the
race and almost immediately began to beat myself over the head with doubt and
frustration. I don’t recommend this, it does no good, but the reality is that
it happens to the vast majority of us. I had been crushing workouts and been
seemingly stride for stride with these two in every workout through the fall
training season, even leading some of the intervals. The self-condemning and
negative statements began to fly. ‘Mentally I just don’t have what it takes to
be at this level.’ ‘I don’t know how to compete any more.’ ‘I must not be as
good as them.’ ‘Why do I have such big big goals, if I so obviously don’t have
what it takes to achieve them?’ ***that last question being one that truly hurt
the most. If you have read my previous
posts, I’m an advocate for dreaming, and doing it big. To my core I believe it
is important, but it can also hurt big. After tears and talks with my mom,
coach, close friends and teammates- along with a solid 2 hours of introverted
reflection on the car ride home I returned to rationality and realized that all
was not lost and I began to focus on the positives and be thankful for whatever
purpose the ‘loss’ might serve. This was
what I came to:
“God isn’t offended by your biggest dreams or boldest
prayers. He is offended by anything less.“
I try to have a daily devotional/reflection time and this
was something impressed upon in the weeks following this race, along with the
necessity of patience in dreaming. I was reminded that these dreams I have will
not come on my time or on my strength.
If I make the 2015 World Team, or the 2016 Olympic Team, or run sub 4:30
in the mile or under 9:20 in the steeple (these are my seemingly outrageous
goals) they will not have been achieved solely because I worked really hard and
had it all together and perfected things.
Short running update there, but what has been impressed upon
me lately is the importance and greatness of community. I have been really been
overwhelmed by it. Maybe it is the
Holiday Season but I have been realizing how many great people I have in my
corner, that keep me going. That along with reading various others posts about
their support systems. My community consists of many people. My immediate
family, mom, cousins, aunts, uncles, friends, friends families, past teammates,
coaches, doctors, massage/rehab therapists, teachers, current teammates, coaches,
those who read this blog that I don’t even know and then the daily acquaintance
who provides a word of encouragement and shot of belief that I really will
accomplish these dreams. In the last 2 months I have just been blown away by
the support, care and hope that I have been given through my community- be it
friendsgiving dinner with the NJNYTC family, a sharp phrase of belief from
Coach Gags, Tommy or Coach Whit (KU), a friend treating me to dinner or
providing a thoughtful gift, someone lending a listening ear, a note from a roommate,
my immediate family sacrificing some of their own Christmas to support me
financially in my journey, or an anonymous donator giving to my NJNY personal
support page. I have just been in awe. My running and life would not be the
same or as worthwhile without community. So with this season of family gatherings I
just want to encourage you to take a minute and reflect on the community around
you. Everyone has their own community- who makes up yours? Merry Christmas!
Check out a few friends thoughts/videos that got me thinking
below.
@kylemerber –“23” http://vimeo.com/112351893
http://karalubieniecki.blogspot.com
http://addie-bracy.blogspot.com/2014/01/im-posting-it-internet-so-it-must-be.html